April 14, 2016


You wanna know what you deserve? Do you really? Because let me tell you something baby doll, it’s a whole lot different than what you’re getting right now. It’s not ignored calls, canceled plans, and mixed signals. Hell, it’s not even unanswered texts, petty fights, and forced smiles. If it’s not right, it’s just not right. And forcing yourself into something that’s not meant to be potentially ruins the opportunity for you to notice the one who is.

But good lord, I’m not saying don’t fight for it. I’m saying don’t fight for the wrong person. Fight like hell for someone who will fight back for you. Who won’t let you leave when you’re angry. Who respects your boundaries and wants to know what’s really going on. Fight for that person. Let them know what they mean to you. And if that person got away? Pick up the phone. Send them a text. Because how risky is a text even? If you can’t send a one liner to someone you’re thinking about, how are you going to be bold in a world that only works for the courageous and brave? A revolutionary idea, call them. Tell them what’s on your heart. It might not go as planned, but now you’ll go to sleep each night knowing you did what you could. You apologized. You told someone what they really mean to you. You tried.

The same concept applies to friendships that are in no sense romantic. People who just love and love you with no ulterior motive or agenda, these are your real friends. The ones who call you out for always being late, who remind you you’re really not meant to be eating that while on a dairy free diet, who will stay on the phone with you until you’re home safe: these are a special kind of people. These people really care about you. And they don’t plan on stopping anytime soon. Everyone deserves friendships like this. If spending time with someone leaves you feeling more drained and upset then before, it’s probably more toxic than it is valuable. And that’s the painful truth.

There’s a big difference between knowing what you deserve, and not settling for less, and being judgemental and entitled. Life is all about balance and walking the fine lines. So let’s figure it out together.

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